I'm Not Ready For A Relationship

This one is tough.
Girls, you might have to help me on this one.

This topic has come up multiple times in my life and definitely when conversing with my gal-pals.

"I'm not ready for a relationship."

My sister and I have debated many times about this topic.

For example, I am in no place to be dating right now. If you refer to my other blog (www.howtobeapickle.blogspot.com), I am sober, and only have been for about four months. This is not the time to be dating or seeking a relationship. That is my own personal decision, and in my case, I'm really not ready for a relationship.

However....

My sister argues that if the right person came along (which also, I don't believe in just one "right" person... so how would I know?), that a girl, even in my situation, would date them or at least let them pursue her.

So, in this argument, I'm going to side with my sister.

Okay, so there is this awesome lady that you really wanna date. She's smokin' hot, she's everything you want, blah blah blah, right?

You guys hang out (mostly in a group setting, maybe some one on one time) quite a bit and you're starting to really get to know each other.

You like her. You like her a whole lot and you think it's time to finally tell your feelings to her.

Then, she tells you....she's not ready for a relationship.

Translation: She's into relationships, just not one with you.

Us women don't want to break hearts. This is the easiest escape route for us gals because instead of you trying to argue with us and us trying to recommunicate, we can just say we're not ready.

For whatever reason, your gal doesn't see you as relationship material.

Part of this excuse comes with another excuse when you probe her for a clearer answer - "I need time to think... I think it's better if we're just friends for now."

Translation: I want you to back off until just being friends is okay with you.

Don't keep trying if she uses either of these excuses with you. She isn't going to take you out of the friend zone, and she won't do it in the future either.

Move on and forget her, and value the friendship that you do have with her.

She's just not that into you.